HIS band’s new single adds to the rather sparse pantheon of rock songs about ‘cutting the cheese’ – but Darkness singer Justin Hawkins sees his future as an entertainer at the cutting of cake.
“Hot On My Tail” is the fifth song to be released from the Lowestoft legends’ upcoming album Dreams On Toast and a cursory listen will leave you in no doubt it is almost entirely about farting.
A snapshot of the lyrics: “I couldn’t hold it in … beans in rich tomato sauce … the rest of that long fateful night was written on the wind … it sounded like a backpack being unzipped … the atmosphere was awful.”
Hot Metal has conducted exhaustive research about other rock songs with a similar theme and we’ve uncovered “Misadventures Of Shitman” by Green Jelly, “The Master Has A Butt” by GWAR and – perhaps – “Mick The Master Farter” by Kevin Bloody Wilson.
However, in an interview with the London Metro, 50-year-old Hawkins indicates an ambition to celebrate cohabitants rather than flatulence.
“I’ve been sober for coming up 19 years and whenever I get invited to a wedding, I’m like ‘fuck this’,” he said in an interview to promote this Saturday night’s show at Wembley Arena.
“Everyone’s drunk. This is really annoying.
“And then I see a band playing and I’m like ‘it’d be much better if I was doing that’. So I’ve just developed this perverse desire to be a wedding singer.
“I’m trying to get Dan (Hawkins, brother and band-mate) to play bass. All he’ll want is ale and bread.
“His arrangement involves ciabatta and whatever is left on the tables.
“I’ll require some remuneration but we can talk about that later.”
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