Album review: Battlesnake – Battlesnake

By BRIAN GIFFIN

YOU may well have heard of Battlesnake by now. They’ve been featured on morning television, opened for KISS in their undies and got in the ring with professional wrestlers on the World is a Vampire tour. Now they’ve finally gotten around to releasing an album, the question is undoubtedly – what exactly does Battlesnake sound like? 

The answer is: exactly how you’d think a band called Battlesnake would sound. With every bit of glorious, unashamed cheese they have at their disposal, this Sydney seven piece unveil an epic conceptual origin story where the spurned child of the Divine rises to conquer in the form of… a battlesnake! Opening with a hammy theatrical intro piece, the tale unfolds in a series of short and catchy explosions headed up by “I Am The Vomit”’s crunchy Priest-like riffing, splashy drums and Sam Frank’s over-the-top vocal dramatics like Jack Black channeling Stu McKenzie (or vice versa). “Beelzebanquet” offers a driving metal mode with Frank’s cartoon villain delivery recalling a slightly less Baroque Byron Roberts as classic twin guitar harmonies come in over the churning riff. “Nazarene Extreme” starts out as straight-up King Gizz worship with fuzzy bass, mock-thrash riffing and further spurts of double-axe attack. At every turn, guitars and keys battle it out for metal supremacy with a combination of blistering solos, cascading harmonies and compelling hooks building to huge singalong choruses with melodramatic, half-spoken singing. It all ends with the menacing stomp of “The Battlesnake”, an epic D&D-style finale of cheesy metal glory. 

Silly and over-the-top in the best possible way, Battlesnake is irresistibly fun and charming victory metal that sounds every bit the way a seven-piece band of RPG-loving maniacs with such a name should sound. You’ll either get it or you won’t, but you’ll have a whole heap of fun along the way.